The Balloon RaceThe BALLOON RACEThe Balloon Race by Alecdeluxe
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(Or, "A Greatly Mistitled Misadventure")
________by Alec Deluxe___________
Jim wasn't an old-fashioned guy, particularly, so he didn't mind always getting beaten by a woman. But Nancy had this way of rubbing his face in it. She beat him at chess, at miniature golf, at cards, at darts, at billiards. It was after one especially vexing trivia game that Jim decided he'd had enough. He got up to leave.
"You're such a sore loser," Nancy told him.
"And you're an ungracious winner," Jim told her. "You need someone to knock down your inflated ego."
Nancy scoffed. "Hell, my ego isn't inflated. THIS is inflated!" In what became the most bizarre demonstration Jim ever witnessed, Nancy took a deep breath, puffed up her cheeks and strained. Soon, to Jim's amazement, her belly shot out from her shirt, blown up as if she had suddenly become nine-months pregnant in an